With respect to Dr. Covey and his famous 7 Habits of Highly Effective People (all habits that will make us better counselors!), here are eight skills that all of us as counselors can work on improving. This article will start with three overarching skills, and then describe five more specific skills to consider in your ongoing development. One way to look at your overall skill set as a consultant (internal or external) is to consider your relative strengths in the three main parts of our business: designing ‘it’, delivering ‘e’ and selling it. These three skills represent the full package for a consultant, regardless of your (“it”) experience.

The Complete Package: “It” Design
This is our technical expertise. These are the “things” we learn in classes and through experience and practice. It’s the front end of our business in most cases. While we can’t underestimate the importance of these skills (and the need to keep upgrading them), we also can’t be satisfied if these skills are top notch. It is not enough. provide “it”
This is another huge skill that many of us are very comfortable with. Once we design our “product”, we should be able to deliver it. This is the skill set that is often most apparent to our clients, or what we tell people we do when they ask us about our profession. Again, this skill set is important, but it alone is not enough. sell it
This skill is, in my experience, the skill that needs improvement the most. Although many books have been written about this skill set, there is one key, which will in and of itself improve your success in selling your work. If you will always focus on customer/customer benefits, rather than product/process features, you will instantly improve your success. Features are components of your product or service. Examples include: size
O height
Oh speed
or the number of units
o Your Experience People don’t buy the features they buy the benefits. We all know this on some level, but rarely do we focus on turning important features of our offering into real benefits. Assuming that your customer/customer will discover the benefit, is to reduce your chance of selling your potential product or
an idea. Some specific skills to consider: Contracting
This is another skill that requires a book that discusses it well and that takes planning and practice to improve. Getting clear agreements with clients upfront about what the work will be, desired outcomes, and what your role will be, is what contracting is all about. Relationship building
Relationship building is important in all three major skill areas. In design, you need to build relationships in order to get the organizational information you need to design effectively. In the delivery process, you must be able to establish good relationships with those involved, to lead to a more successful outcome. When selling, it is important to remember that selling is a relationship process. People buy into others and believe in their ability to deliver. Focusing on relationships is more than just building a relationship, which can happen very quickly. Relationship building focuses on the long term and requires significant commitment. Warning: Building relationships with people is important, but realize that if your focus is on only one person in the organization, when they leave (get a promotion, get a new job, downsize, or whatever) you’ve lost your leverage to help the organization. Therefore, remember to build a network of relationships within your client organizations. Separate process from content
It is very important to maintain perspective while in the client’s organization. Customers will focus on the content (of your meeting, your product, your course deliverables, or whatever), but if the process isn’t taken care of, results can be compromised. Working on your ability to step back and recognize what is happening at the level of group and interpersonal dynamics will improve your success. Customers don’t always know they need this, but they’ll always know that you “did something” to make things work better when you can reference and improve the process while sharing your business content. This skill is often the key to additional work or referrals. Socratic questioning
Socrates is immortalized at least in part because of his teaching approach of asking a set of questions that lead the student to discover answers for themselves. When your customers discover the answers to their problems, rather than just hearing them from you, they will get the answers. Their ability to adhere to concepts, apply them, and improve their situation will increase. Improving your ability to help them find out (through the use of Socratic questions) is a very important, though often overlooked, skill. Using more questions will cause you to lose the sense of the power you have for the “correct” answer. But the customer gains much more than you lose. While you may feel like you’re losing out emotionally, you’re gaining with the client, and perhaps even strengthening your relationship with them. Saying “No!”
Most of us need to improve our ability to say this. Of course we can say it physically, (OK, just for practice, say it three times now – out loud!) but we all know we don’t always say it when we wish we could! Improving your judgment of when to use this word will help you in three important ways, namely time management, happiness level, and customer success. Time management Many time management problems stem from trying to do too much. When people (clients, peers, anyone) ask you to do something you don’t feel like the best fit for, or don’t really want to do, use your word! Level of Happiness When we focus our energy on the things we want to do or need to do (instead of just the things people tell us to do or we feel we should do), we will be happier! Say this to help you maintain and respect your priorities. Customer Success Sometimes a customer may ask you for something (“We just need this [you fill in the blank]”) that you know, or strongly believe, is the wrong thing. These are the times when you have to step back and be real. Help them understand your point, and focus them on the outcome, not the proposed solution. In these cases, you may not say ‘no’, exactly, but that’s what you really mean!

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